"Mistrust those in whom the urge to punish is strong." Friedrich Nietzche

"Any and all non-violent, non-coercive, non-larcenous, consensual adult behavior that does not physically harm other people or their property or directly and immediately endangers same, that does not disturb the peace or create a public nuisance, and that is done in private, especially on private property, is the inalienable right of all adults. In a truly free and liberty-loving society, ruled by a secular government, no laws should be passed to prohibit such behavior. Any laws now existing that are contrary to the above definition of inalienable rights are violations of the rights of adults and should be made null and void." D. M. Mitchell (from The Myth of Inalienable Rights, at: http://dowehaverights.blogspot.com/)

Wednesday, August 01, 2007

Why Must Sex Be Dirty?

Ever since I was a teenager, with raging hormones and erections at inconvenient times, I have been fighting against the illogical mind-set that always depicts sex as dirty, filthy, nasty, or obscene; and women who like sex as whores, sluts, cunts, pussies, or bitches. (I mean, come on guys, none of us would be here if mom didn't have sex, right? Is she a whore, slut, cunt, pussy, or bitch? Besides, if all women believed that virtue lay only with having sex for babies, where would we be guys? . . . gay or jerking off a lot more than we do now, right?)

I blame this negative attitude about sex on religion, especially the Christian religion. At some point in the past the religious leaders decided that the sex act was bad but necessary, if they wanted more church members. You--both men and women--weren't supposed to enjoy sex, and you were only supposed to do it to have children. Any other reason to have sex was just plain evil sinning. And the people bought it! Hell, they're still buying it today. This perversion of a wonderful and natural behavior has led to some people not being able to fully enjoy sex without some form of their perverse beliefs involved, such as bondage (I can't help what's happening to me), spanking or whipping (punishment for enjoying sex), or being called a whore, or slut (since sex is dirty, men, usually, need to call their sex partners degrading names, but sometimes women need it too).

Look, folks, humans are by nature very sexy animals. Human males have the largest penis size for body weight of any mammal, and almost all other animals. Human females don't have a "season." The right man, with the right approach, can have sex with a particular women at almost anytime of the day, night, week, month, or year. Horses have a reputation as being very virile. But a good stud can only have sex with one or two mares a day for maybe a month, then he will need a long break, as in weeks or months, before doing it again. When I was in my thirties, I lived with a very fine lady that I loved very much. The feeling was reciprocal. We had sex every day, sometimes more than once a day, for at least a year before we slowed down . . . slowed down, not stopped. And I am sure there are men out there who could have fucked circles around me, so to speak.

My point is this: Either by evolution or by design, if you are religious, humans were made to have sex and have it a lot and to enjoy it immensely. Consider that many women can enjoy multiple orgasms if they allow themselves to let go. So why would we not want to celebrate sex as the extremely good thing it can be, from an evolutionary point of view? Or why would we not do the same if God, a god, somebody's God, made humans such sexual, sensual beings? I mean, this begs the question: What kind of perverse being would make sex such an enjoyable behavior, then tell us that the only time it is appropriate is when it is just one man and one woman, with the man on top, not to be enjoyed, and only to have babies!

If we take the Christian's Bible for an example, consider the following. Not withstanding some written rules in the Bible about some sexual behavior--which may have been the opinions of the writer only--Adam and Eve and their children had to have had sex together in order to produce the human race, right? Ditto for Noah, his wife, his sons, and their wives. Abraham and his wife Sarah were half brother and sister. Lot and his daughters had sex. With all this type of sex going on, which is absolutely forbidden today, God didn't say a thing. Not a peep out of him. No, "Okay this time, but don't do it again." Nope. If silence is acceptance, then God put his seal of approval on incest! And then, a few centuries later, at the beginning of the Christian church, a bunch of doughty old men said that God didn't want people to enjoy their bodies sexually? Oh, and one last thing about the Bible times. A man could have as many wives as he could afford, plus concubines, and slaves (conveniently called "servants"). He could have sex with, and have children by, any wife, concubine, or slave that he owned. He just wasn't supposed to go dallying in his neighbor's house.

Maybe, just maybe, the Christian's God wants us to enjoy our sexuality. Of course, like any behavior of good living, there are some rules that should be followed. (In any good society, the rules should be as few as possible; to ensure the protection of the rights of others while allowing the most freedom of choice for everyone.) The first rule, of course is the Golden Rule: Do unto others as you would have others do unto you. Or, in more modern language: Treat others as you want to be treated. The Buddha and Confucius both said something like that 500 years before Christ.

So, if you don't like to be forced, coerced, hurt, or degraded when having sex, don't do it to others. But more, you should make a serious attempt to prevent unwanted pregnancies. Ditto for sexually transmissible diseases. Those two aren't hard in today's modern world. And finally, you should not have sex with anyone who is not mentally competent enough to willingly agree to have sex and to understand the possible consequences. Let's just say consenting adults only. And, if like Adam and Eve, or Lot and his daughters, you and a close relative decide to have sex, I would strongly suggest that you especially make a serious attempt to not have children. Not that you couldn't have physically and mentally healthy ones, but why take the chance?

So, after taking those few, simple rules into consideration, go ahead and enjoy sex for the wonderful, delicious, energizing, relaxing, fun, carnally exhilarating behavior that it is. Sex is not dirty, nasty, or obscene. Murder, rape, child molesting, torture and a whole bunch of other rights-violating behaviors are dirty, nasty, and obscene.


Tomche said...

That was an wonderful article. I competely with all points that you have made. I think too that religion is responsible for degrading sex. Not only the chiristain religion, but also others. Before columbus discovered america, all natives where having sex as and when they liked. They used to hav sex in front of others just like animals. columbus did not like it and he used to get the men and women beaten up for having sex in open, when he and his men enjoyed and raped the native women behind closed doors.

I am believe in sex being natural too and hence I opened up my blog on sex.

Thank you and keep up the good work.

D. M. Mitchell said...

Tomche, I hope you visit here again to see if there are other comments. I tried to email a thank you for your supportive comment but it couldn't be delivered for some reason. I tried twice. Anyway, thank you.

D.M. Mitchell